We’ve been fingerprinted.
The months leading up to an adoption are so very different from the nine months of being pregnant. Paperwork, training, fingerprints, more paperwork, more fingerprints. I’ve been to UPS more times in the last couple months than I’ve been in my entire life.
Today the boys and I headed to the immigration office to be fingerprinted. A few months ago we were fingerprinted by the Johnson County sheriff’s office and had local and national background checks done. Today’s fingerprints should be the last step to receiving immigration approval for our daughter.
Our daughter. That is so very weird to say sometimes. A few months ago I had a hard time calling her my daughter. We were adopting. We were following what we felt called to do but I wasn’t feeling her kick or seeing her on an ultrasound. We don’t have a picture yet. We don’t know anything about her. We still have a long wait to be matched with a child, so calling her my daughter just sounded so strange.
As I struggled with the phrase ‘my daughter,’ God began to soften my heart and help me understand the beauty in adoption. This little girl was born to parents that for whatever reason could not care for her and felt no other choice but to walk away and hope for a better life for her. I cannot begin to image the pain and heartache in making that decision, walking away from their child. Unfortunately that is the reality for many in other countries. But, because of their decision, God is entrusting this little girl to us. She will be my daughter because God has entrusted her to me, just like he entrusted my boys to me. What a humbling thought.
Now when I think about my children I no longer think only of my two boys. I have two boys and a girl; I just haven’t met one of them yet. I cannot wait to meet her, to find out what she’s like, to find out the talents, passions and personality God has given her.
We are each created so uniquely as my boys demonstrated at the immigration office today. I was prepared with a bag full of activities and books. My oldest sat quietly making designs on his geoboard. He loves to create. That child can create something out of anything. Give him crayons, paint, rubber bands, paper, cardboard box, string, whatever it may be and he will make you something. And he loves to give it away. That kid has such an amazing heart. And then there’s my youngest. Running back and forth, back and forth until he decided the row of chairs made a good jungle gym. The room was quiet except for him shrieking in laughter as I tried to pull him from the chairs. He is a mover and has more energy than I can handle sometimes but oh how he makes us laugh. I love them both so much! And I can’t wait to see the uniqueness of my daughter.
We still have several months of waiting ahead but I can’t wait to meet her!